单身？

单身未必是件坏事，至少现在想做什么可以放胆去做，但是十年后的今天，我是否还会有同样的想法吗？

Lately...it was dawned upon me that i am still single. Perhaps that was because i watched too many dramas like Taiwanese drama "败犬女王” and Korean drama“我们结婚吧” . Both these dramas depict women in their 30s who are still looking for love. In the Taiwanese drama, the female lead is 33 years old who is a high flier in her career and she actually end up with this man 8 years younger...and in the Korean drama, it talked about how 34year old successful career woman found her love one and handle marriage and giving birth at a later age. Initially i was pretty cool, "aiya no bf no bf lo" I have the time to do what i want and the chance to indulge in "drama ma ma la la land" and not have any worries that " hey i neglected my bf or something"

However recently, receiving too many...really too many wedding invitations from my close friends and looking at my friends wedding pictures...i start to ponder...hey y am i still single? Am i really that bad? Do i have like super bad character? Am i not good looking and presentable at all? Am i not academically qualified?

"You are too picky la...your expectations too high..."

That was what my friends tell me but was i wrong to expect to find someone of equal or even higher standing with me? I am not looking for super good looking dudes with well trained model like guys...No!!! I only want someone presentable whom i can depend on and who would share life experiences with me. Someone who can provide security and make me feel like a 小女人 in front of him. Someone whom i idolises and share his knowledge about the world with me. Someone whom i know would be the one when i see him...

"this is hard...how do you know that person is the one???"

I asked this question to a friend who answers me this..." you would know it...it is the feeling...it just comes" ...i find it hard to comprehend...Something that till now i do not understand. I go around listening to love stories of friends and colleagues. When things happen, they just happen. 要挡都挡不了…！Most stories involve people who dun really know each other at first, but when one saw the other, immediately the guy wants to know the gal and think that she is the one. Amazing isn't it?

"So you got to start by knowing people first!!! With the kind of schedule and numerous personal activities you are having, how are you going to meet new people? FB? MSN???"

I admit i am a drama queen, who likes to stay at home watching korean & taiwanese dramas. Not only that, i am a loner...i can go jogging alone, go gym alone, do kickboxing alone, shop alone, eat alone...in fact if i have the time, i can sing alone too... That is how anti social i am...i tried to attend more events, like parties or even events...however...i actually got quite sick and tired of knowing new people this year especially, its like i actually enjoyed catching up with old friends at the parties more than knowing new people. & to say the truth...or perhaps its just me...i find some new people at parties very "hypocritical"...i mean some...not all...
Knowing people through facebook and conversing through the net is worse! Online is deceiving...we cannot hear the other party's voice and it is not easy knowing how the person feel. Some people can put themselves single, but they can be already attached or worse still married even! (Sorry to say...this is done by both men and women) However, i guess if i do know someone online, I think the best way to know him better is still through the traditional way...using the phone and personal meet ups...

"join social networking events and sites"

Ok i am actually a member of SDU since my company provides corporate membership. This is something interesting...MOE actually has a SDS coordinator who provide services for single people to find partners. So there was once i met up with my coordinator who asks me to fill up this really long questionaire and i come to know that there is actually quite a number of singles in my organisation. I feel pretty 丢脸, in the past when i see events from SDU, i just glanced through and put aside everything, i am super confident that i do not need to be a member. (moreover during that time i was attached) now...it seemed that i am trying to find worthwhile activities to go out. My coordinator arranged for one session for me with this guy, he is in every aspect an eligible bachelor, not as tall as what i wanted though. However i guess there are no sparks between us...he did not call me at all and i was not eager to wait for his call too.

Does that mean he is not the one? Then i wonder how many more such "matchmaking" sessions am i suppose to go for before knowing the one.A part of me is craving for companionship but another part of me is telling me that it is such a tiring process, can he just drop down from the sky and tell me, hello i am the one!
My colleugue tells me, “不要强求，这是急不来的” I guess i just got to go with the flow, there is no harm knowing more people, i shall just accept the single "golden pass" to widen my social circle and get to know people who are sincere and not be bounded by the restrictions of being attached. I still believe, my special someone is waiting for me somewhere...

This reminds me of this song...Especially the very last part of the chorus...

遇见
听见冬天的离开
我在某年某月醒过来
我想我等我期待
未来却不能理智安排

阴天傍晚车窗外
未来有一个人在等待
向左向右向前看
爱要拐几个弯才来

我遇见谁会有怎样的对白
我等的人他在多远的未来
我听见风来自地铁和人海
我排著队拿著爱的号码牌

我往前飞飞过一片时间海
我们也常在爱情里受伤害
我看著路梦的入口有点窄
我遇见你是最美丽的意外
终有一天我的谜底会揭开